I think the bacon makes it charming

Things have not quite gone from bad to worse.  It’s not worse, it’s just weird.  I sat down to write something for me for the first time in days. (Well, the first non school related writing that I have done since I wrote Grampa Tom’s Eulogy.) And I noticed that my mom’s Bing history said that her last two searches were ” Invisible Socks” and “Sentence using Inexorable.”  (Oh, stop, I didn’t snoop, it was right up there with the MSN  news feed.

Anyone I thought that was hilarious, because I was just imagining what could possibly have necessitated searches for those two very specific things, and then Mac called me and asked if I wanted to make some extra money.  (Sometimes the catering company she works for needs extra waitstaff.  I do not like people in general, and she knows that.) They needed help in the kitchen making Penguins out of Olives and cream cheese.  That set me off again, because now I’m picturing God in Heaven’s kitchen trying to make flightless waterfowl out of the appetizers.

I went, because how do you turn down an offer like that?

Then Mac made me eat biscuit casserole.  It sounds terrible, but it had bacon. I might actually make it through the semester.

Taking a proper gander

I do love my friends, I really do. I know I snark a lot, but the world seriously harshes me a lot of the time and, unfortunately, they are usually the first line of defense between me and the rest of the world.  This has become increasingly important to me in light of the dawning of my affliction.

Worst Jane Austen novel, ever.

I am aware that I was less than pleasant this weekend, so I thought I would volunteer to drive us around today. And I wouldn’t demand coffee.

Mac loves to go to the dollar store.  I don’t really see the attraction, but I thought I would keep an open mind. I was amazed. Not just by the bargains, but  at the strangely named off brand items.

Helena wanted to go to the used bookstore,so I nailed a smile to my face and we ventured forth. There were only a few weird spots.  I was huddled in the clearance section trying to breathe (bad sinus, not bad attitude for a change) and as I was sniffing, my decongestant suddenly started to work. I was taking a big sniff and all of a sudden I could breathe and smell at the same time. This caused an awkward moment because I was standing right next to some guy in a cape.

It looked like I had inhaled his odor and enjoyed it.

I did not.

The next moment of weird was the shelving of a book called, “The importance of proper ventilation”.  It was placed right over the sign that said, ” True Crime.”

Didn’t I do good with the attitude?

This is my favorite off brand: Mr. Moo cheese dip